Demolition Lover
by BlackSymmetry
Summary: I'm far from happy, hell I've never actually been happy, and it hurts to know that I'm going to die tomorrow without ever experiencing at least an ounce of joy. I just can't help but feel that there's no point in anything anymore, I can't even eat any chocolate. What's the point I'm dying anyway...But I don't want to die.


This is just a one-shot I had lingering in my head after listening to Demolition Lover, the song reminded me so much of Matt and Mello and I just had to write something about it and as for my other story 'Notice Me Senpai' I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while, I've been having a little trouble trying to write the next chapter, I really want it to be good and to not end up disappointing my readers. I've also been overworked with school and homework that I haven't really found the time. Except right now in which I just decided to fuck this bullshit.

I'll try working on it this month and will get the next chapter up as soon as possible. Anyway hope you enjoy this, I recommend listening to Demolition Lovers by My Chemical Romance while you're reading this it makes the story all the more better.

Disclaimer: If Mello isn't alive right now then I don't own Death Note

**Mello's P.O.V**

I stood on top of the roof of Matt and I's hideout. The sky was a depressing grey that didn't help my mood in the least bit, especially when it started to rain heavily, soaking the black t-shirt I wore. I've been up here for a while now, just staring at the clouds…thinking, which only made me feel worse but it couldn't be helped, all I've been doing is thinking these past few months.

I'm far from happy, hell I've never actually_ been_ happy_, _and it hurts to know I'm going to die tomorrow without ever experiencing at least an _ounce _of joy. I just can't help but feel that there's no point in anything anymore, I can't even eat any chocolate. _What's the point I'm dying_ _anyway. _But I don't want to die, I've never even gotten the chance to live up to my dreams, my expectations; I wanted to be L's successor but that doesn't hold any appeal to me now. I've been pondering the idea of becoming a writer, ever since I finished writing the L.A. BB Murder Cases, I've taken an interest in writing, whether it be poetry, short stories, novels it's just fascinating to be able to make a story come to life using only a pencil, paper and one's imagination, it's also one of the things that's been keeping me from pushing past my breaking point, though I'm sure I reached that line a long time ago, ever since Roger had first called Near and I into his office. I like to imagine myself as a famous mystery or horror writer, sitting at a desk writing furiously in a notebook with stacks of paper piled high next to me and each paper would tell a story that would bring people immense emotions while reading it. Of course I know I'm just entertaining my delusions but it's good to dream of what I could've been had these outcomes have been different…it almost makes me want to cry.

I'm sacrificing my life so Kira can be stopped and Near can win. I only started this case so I can avenge L and beat Near, it's selfish but I'm not sorry. And even after everything I've done I _still _haven't beaten him….it's funny how cruel life can be isn't it? The thing I've been working for my entire life was ruined and all my hard work went to waste, I never got to do anything I wanted, all my dreams were crushed when I was only 14. How unpleasant….

I stood up and looked up towards the sky, wiping some of my hair that was now completely plastered to my face and drenched, out of my eyes. I can hear bells, the same bells that would ring from the old clock tower back at Wammy's. For a short moment I was back at the orphanage, studying and hanging out in the big tree next to the gate, playing football with some of the other children, staying up past curfew and reading under the blanket with a small flashlight. I never really liked it there but it had become my home…home. Why? Why did things have to turn out like this. I felt tears well up in my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. _This is the only thing that can be done though, if I don't do this Near will die and Kira will continue killing…I hate this_. I squeezed my eyes shut when I really felt them start to burn. _It's just not fair-_

_Hand in mine, into your icy blues and then I'd say to you we could take to the highway_

"Mello? What are you doing out here in the rain" _Matt, oh Matt "_you look like a drowned cat" Matt smirked and walked up to me "ah damn, my cigarettes getting wet" he cursed under his breath and stubbed it out underneath his boot, I didn't say anything to him though, I'm afraid if I try to speak I'll get choked up and start crying. "…"

"mm? Mello? Are you alrigh-…" I lowered my head and clenched the fabric of my jeans, I'll miss him but as long as he lives and gets away I'll be fine...I can't bear the thought of Matt dying because of me, he was the one who brought my sanity back when I was at the lowest of all lows, just his very presence could calm me down, he's my best friend; and he means so much to me, "Mello" I opened my eyes curiously at the tone of his voice, it had changed from cocky to sullen so quickly. "You're thinking about the plan aren't you…" he took my hand in his and moved closer to me, the physical contact and closeness set me a flame and burned the skin where our hands met, I'm pretty sure I was blushing too, I hate blushing, but only he makes me feel this way. "Hey, I won't let you die alone…we'll go together" it was then that I finally felt the tears run down my cheeks, and the rain was only at a drizzle now making it all the more noticeable.

_With this trunk of ammunition too I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets_

Matt turned me towards him and took my chin in his other hand, lifting my head up to look at him, not once separating our hands. He looked deeply into my eyes and I found myself staring at his dark blue orbs that were usually covered with his goggles. I wasn't used to being this intimate with someone and once again I felt my cheeks heat up. His hand moved to cradle my cheek and brush away the tears with his thumb "so cute" he unconsciously whispered, and that one statement made butterflies erupt in my stomach.

_I'm trying, I'm trying, to let you know just how much you mean to me and after all the things we put each other through and_

"You know you're my best friend Mello, we'll be with each other 'til the end" I held back a shiver and looked away from him, I can't let him die with me that's not a part of the plan. "tch, since when have you started getting sentimental Matt"

_I would drive on to the end with you, a liquor store or two keeps the gas tank full and I feel like there's nothing left to do, but prove myself to you and we'll keep it running_

"Since yesterday" he gently turned my head to look at him again "I know you don't want to die Mello, but I know it's the only way, so if you're going I'm going with you"

"No, you can't, I-"

"Mello why can't you just shut up and listen for once" he shook his head comically but quickly adapted a more serious expression "I'm going to do this whether you like it or not, so just accept it…you mean so much to me" I trembled a bit and broke our hands, only for me to hug him tightly, crying silent tears. I felt his arms wrap around my waist and hold me close to his body, he's so warm….

_But this time, I mean it, I'll let you know just how much you mean to me_

I buried my face in his shoulder when I felt his ungloved hands slip under my shirt and stroke the small of my back, I arched a bit towards him and gripped his shirt in my hands. My lower back was sensitive "hmmm your skins really soft" Matt pulled back a little bit without parting our bodies and brought our lips together in a passionate kiss that sent electrifying sparks shooting down my spine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and let all thoughts about the plan and dying vanish and only focused on how good it felt to have Matt's lips against mine. I ran my hands through his mess of brown hair and involuntarily shivered when I felt Matt's tongue slip out and lick my bottom lip, silently asking for permission to come inside. I tentatively parted my lips and let the other's wet muscle snake into my mouth and explore each and every crevice. His tongue ran over my teeth, my cheeks, the roof of my mouth and then finally began to play with mine. Our saliva mixed together as both of our tongues ran over each other's sensually. _He tastes like cinnamon and cigarettes. _Not a bad taste especially considering he's a chain smoker. I squeaked when I felt his hand move lower to squeeze my backside which in turn caused Matt to let out a groan and break apart, breathing heavily "let's go inside"

_As snow falls on desert sky, until the end of everything, I'm trying, I'm trying, to let you know how much you mean_

Matt picked me up bridal style and carried me over to the door, kicking it open in a blind haste. I leaned my head against his shoulder and bit my lip, anticipating what was going to happen when we reached the bedroom, I've never had sex before so I was kind of worried. I'm not one to give up dominance but maybe just this once.

_As days fade, and nights grow and we grow cold_

I was startled out of my reverie when I felt myself be thrown onto the bed, _when did we get in here _I wasn't given much time to wonder though, when Matt had thrown off his shirt and crawled on top of me, kissing and licking my neck. My hands clutched his back as his fingers grasped my hair in a light grip and tilted my head more to the side for easier access. "a-ah" I allowed a pleasured and pained filled moan to fall from my lips as Matt sunk his teeth in my neck, sucking and biting hard. I gasped and panted as he licked the newly forming hickey apologetically.

_Until the end, until this pool of blood, until this, I mean this, I mean this_

Matt lifted his head up and pulled my shirt off as well throwing it behind him and my pants followed soon after, leaving me in just my black boxers. He lowered himself down and once again began lapping at the skin of my neck. I decided to tease him a little and unbuttoned his jeans, reaching inside his boxers to stroke his erection lightly. Matt growled and started to thrust into my hand, urging me to go faster. I almost giggled. _Almost._

_Until the end of…I'm trying, I'm trying, to let you know how much you mean, as days fade, and nights grow, and we grow cold_

Matt's hands caressed my shoulders down to my arms, all the way to my sides and stomach and then my hips, thighs and legs. His touch made my skin feel on fire.

He leaned down and licked a trail from my chest to my stomach, I couldn't stop the high-pitched moans that fell from my lips. Matt rose back up to smash his lips onto mine, leaving me breathless and panting. He pulled my boxers down my legs and threw them in a random spot. He stood up immediately began tugging his boots off and then his pants and underwear followed. He eagerly got back on top of me and held up three fingers, _not one for foreplay I see, _I took them into my mouth and made sure to wet them as much as I could. Matt removed his fingers and placed them at my entrance, pushing the first finger inside all the way up to the knuckle and then the second one scissoring them, I squirmed uncomfortably at the foreign feeling and tried to relax and then I felt a third finger enter, which made me let out a pained moan. "Relax Mello, it won't hurt as much" Matt whispered reassuringly into my ear before biting my lobe, making me gasp over the pain. He continued to thrust his fingers in and out of me, preparing me for something _much _bigger. I felt his erection twitch and throb against my thigh and knew that Matt was holding himself back for my sake. He was panting heavily against my skin, trying to regulate his breathing. "Matt, take me" He raised his head up to look at me "Mello are you sure?"

"Yes, just do it, I want you i-inside of me" his eyes darkened and lidded. Matt licked his lips and slid his hands along my thighs, pushing them up, leaving me completely exposed.

_But this time, we'll show them, we'll show them all how much we mean, as snow falls on desert sky, until the end of every..._

Matt placed the head of his penis at my entrance and slowly pushed inside, until he was fully sheathed "ughhh Mello…so tight…haaah" Matt squeezed my caressed my thighs a couple of times before letting go, his hands coming to fist the sheets beside my head, his face hovering directly above mine. My legs came to rest on his shoulders while my fingers clasped the blanket above me. I let out a cry of pain that was stifled by a short and sweet kiss "it'll get better, I promise, just tell me when to move" I nodded and laid there, trying to adjust to the feeling of being stretched. "Okay, move" Matt pulled out and thrust back in slowly, letting out a shuddered groan. I closed my eyes and panted softly, concentrating on the feeling of Matt moving inside of me. "AH! Matt, t-there"

_All we are, all we are is bullets I mean this, all we are, all we are is bullets I mean this (x2)_

Matt angled his thrusts to hit my prostate and started thrusting faster and harder, his moans and groans increasing is volume.

"Ah, ah..hnn…aaaaaahh! M-Matt..I..AH!" I was screaming and moaning from the pleasure, I was in absolute bliss in that moment. He was driving me insane. I can feel Matt's intense gaze on me but I couldn't open my eyes. The bed was squeaking and banging against the wall with every hard thrust from Matt….I could feel my climax coming, but I never wanted this to end.

_As lead rains, and pass on through, our phantoms, forever, forever, like scarecrows, that fuel this flame, we're burning, forever and ever_

_Make me forget who I am _I wanted to shout it out, scream it, but the only thing that could escape my lips were high-pitched whines and moans "ah, ahhh, ahhhh Mello…so pretty, so sexy…ugh" Matt panted, just his words made me want to come, I was close…so close. I could tell Matt was to, since his thrusts started coming faster and erratic.

_Know how much I want to show you you're the only one, like a bed of roses there's a dozen reasons in this gun_

The only thing I could focus on was Matt, _only he can make me feel this way_. It was hot in here, I feel like I'm suffocating in pleasure, I can barely breathe. Matt laced his hands with mine and pressed them down beside my head, thrusting in and out of me desperately but lovingly, guttural and pleasure filled noises erupting from his mouth. _Oh I love you so much Matt. _I could feel my whole world falling down around me but as long as I'm with Matt….I'll be okay.

_When as we're falling down, and in this pool of blood, when as we're touching hands, and as we're falling down, when in this pool of blood, when as we're falling down_

"AHHHH MATT!" my back arched off the bed and my whole body trembled with indulgence. Matt's arms encircled the small of my back, as he spilled his seed deep inside of me at the same time, with a loud groan. We rode out our orgasms together and then stilled. We both laid there for a moment, catching our breath and then finally our eyes met and I just knew that we would fall together.

_I'll meet your eyes…I mean this, forever_

Well it's done, sorry the sex scene wasn't so great, I got this idea late at night and towards the beginning I was fine but as it got later, I grew more tired and kind of hurried to finish. My mom broke her computer so she has to use my laptop and she would definitely kill me if she found my stories. Anyway did you like it hate it, I'm open to flames and constructive criticism. So R&R


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